I live in a very small neighborhood that is one block long with a dead end. We all have ranch homes. The wires hang a little low. Even the trash trucks graze them weekly.
Today I heard a box truck. Any time I hear a box truck, I look to see how many houses have had the telephone lines ripped off.
Today it was two and nearly mine.
I texted the neighbor who works for AT&T. They don't own the poles and can do nothing. Ohio Edison owns them and the neighbor down the street who retired from OE has already pleaded for an additional pole to be added and they said no. He said that the city would have to make that call.
Today, I called the city. I told them that at least every other month, a box truck/delivery truck comes down our road, rips at least one phone line down and keeps on going. I told them that I hauled off after the guy this AM, on broken foot no less (yes, I'm regretting it) and asked if he really didn't know that he had just ripped lines off as he drove down the road.
He hadn't. Really? How could you not hear the thwack! as you are smacking the lines?
So, I had a visit from the Public Works guy from the city. "We've measured it and there is only a 1 foot drop from this pole to the pole down there." (The poles are three yards apart and further apart than standards dictate.) "Even 1 foot will make a difference at least for the garbage trucks," I said. Then neighbors started coming out and telling him the same story I had. Multiple lines. Multiple times. Regular basis.
The city guy is trying to see what he can do. "You guys need to put the tallest mast on your house that you can.
Really, city guy? You have to hire an electrician to come out and to do that. You also have to pull permits because the city will fine you. Just put in the extra pole please, and we should be good.
Rrrr.
Smiles in my day:
- Meeting with Mr. B-, the principal, to get the fine details of the walkathon ironed out for tomorrow. The weather is to be gorgeous, the trail is dry and I have my truck loaded down with 624 bottles of water. We'll have a great day! (No, I'm not walking. I'll be manning the water station.)
- K- had a great substitute today! She was a wonderful lady!
- K- being excited about earning her 100 BC bracelet. It's just a little silicone bracelet, but she was proud of it. It's a lot of hard work for that thing!
- LL Bean has 15 % off through Columbus Day for their card holders. I noticed that K-'s current snow boots are coming apart. I'll return those to Bean and get the new pair for just a handful of dollars. I love a company that stands by their guarantee!
Have a great weekend!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
The "All About Me" bag.
When I called to check in with K- on Tuesday afternoon, my mother-in-law said that she was in the basement gathering items for her "All About Me" bag that she was to take to school the very next day. When K- arrived home, I saw that she had placed a wooden butterfly that she had painted for her grandma, a ball and a deck of Old Maid cards. Here at home, she scurried around to find an assortment of items to include. Items placed in the paper lunch sack are, but possibly not completely, limited to the following:
1. A Star Wars DS game box. She wanted to take the game, but I vetoed that. I told her the box was well more than enough.
2. The movie, Tangled.
3. A Toy Story book.
4. The "Kitties in the basket" matryoshka.
5. A handful of Barbie stickers.
6. A rock from the back yard.
7. Frog and rainbow erasers.
8. The letter she received from Buddy, her Elf a Shelf, last Christmas Eve.
9. A picture of her friend, D-, who she will probably date someday.
10. A lenticular postcard of the Statue of Liberty. As you flick it, her hips sway back and forth.
11. A signed, computer-generated certificate from the adoptive unit of the county that we adopted her from, congratulating her on forever becoming a part of our family.
12. Her adoption photo that had to be retaken because of faulty film. Never mind that the tied the dress sash over her upper arm and it looks like she is trapped. Didn't notice that until after the photos were all cut and half handed out. Oh well. It's a good story.
The adoption certificate brought up a good conversation. "So K-, what are you going to share with the class about adoption?"
"That it's good."
"Well, that's a good thing, but what if they ask you about when you came to be with us? They might wonder. You know, you didn't live in my stomach."
"I know that. But the lady who's stomach I did live in-- what about her?"
"Doll, I can tell you this. We never met her. She knew that she couldn't take care of you, so she left you at the hospital with all of the doctors and nurses because she knew you would be safe there. That's how we got the call and were able to come pick you up. We're very thankful for her decision to do what was right and to make sure you were well taken care of."
She grabbed me up and hugged me. This morning, she woke up and told me that she was going to share with the class that the best thing in her bag was her adoption and that she loved her mom and dad the best.
God bless that little kid.
Smiles in my day:
- The Russian Festival is on my list for the end of the day. My friend, C-, and I are going to go. "So, C-, do you want to go be Russian?" She stopped dead in her tracks, a smile from ear to ear and then I heard, "ABSOLUTELY!" We've gone together in the past and had a really nice time. To go, you must be patient. Generally, C-, stands in the food line as I go to hit up the matryoshka table for K-. We meet back up, bet our pierogie on and live the rest of the evening in a cholesterol induced coma. More delicious than I can explain. Yum. Actually, y.u.m. :sigh:
- K- so excited that she has a pioneer outfit to wear this weekend. Last year, we helped Hubs with his pioneer festival. We have a gold panning game we help Hubs do, and last year K- had to wear her school uniform. This year she'll go as Laura Ingalls. (The child has the braidable hair for it.) I'm sure Hubs will bring my yardages of fabric home for me to wear. Last year, I was so confused by the amount of fabric, that I had to go have my neighbor help me. "Michelle, can you help me get dressed?" All she could do was laugh. My cam boot won't be of period dress, but they'll just have to ignore it.
Have a great day!
1. A Star Wars DS game box. She wanted to take the game, but I vetoed that. I told her the box was well more than enough.
2. The movie, Tangled.
3. A Toy Story book.
4. The "Kitties in the basket" matryoshka.
5. A handful of Barbie stickers.
6. A rock from the back yard.
7. Frog and rainbow erasers.
8. The letter she received from Buddy, her Elf a Shelf, last Christmas Eve.
9. A picture of her friend, D-, who she will probably date someday.
10. A lenticular postcard of the Statue of Liberty. As you flick it, her hips sway back and forth.
11. A signed, computer-generated certificate from the adoptive unit of the county that we adopted her from, congratulating her on forever becoming a part of our family.
12. Her adoption photo that had to be retaken because of faulty film. Never mind that the tied the dress sash over her upper arm and it looks like she is trapped. Didn't notice that until after the photos were all cut and half handed out. Oh well. It's a good story.
The adoption certificate brought up a good conversation. "So K-, what are you going to share with the class about adoption?"
"That it's good."
"Well, that's a good thing, but what if they ask you about when you came to be with us? They might wonder. You know, you didn't live in my stomach."
"I know that. But the lady who's stomach I did live in-- what about her?"
"Doll, I can tell you this. We never met her. She knew that she couldn't take care of you, so she left you at the hospital with all of the doctors and nurses because she knew you would be safe there. That's how we got the call and were able to come pick you up. We're very thankful for her decision to do what was right and to make sure you were well taken care of."
She grabbed me up and hugged me. This morning, she woke up and told me that she was going to share with the class that the best thing in her bag was her adoption and that she loved her mom and dad the best.
God bless that little kid.
Smiles in my day:
- The Russian Festival is on my list for the end of the day. My friend, C-, and I are going to go. "So, C-, do you want to go be Russian?" She stopped dead in her tracks, a smile from ear to ear and then I heard, "ABSOLUTELY!" We've gone together in the past and had a really nice time. To go, you must be patient. Generally, C-, stands in the food line as I go to hit up the matryoshka table for K-. We meet back up, bet our pierogie on and live the rest of the evening in a cholesterol induced coma. More delicious than I can explain. Yum. Actually, y.u.m. :sigh:
- K- so excited that she has a pioneer outfit to wear this weekend. Last year, we helped Hubs with his pioneer festival. We have a gold panning game we help Hubs do, and last year K- had to wear her school uniform. This year she'll go as Laura Ingalls. (The child has the braidable hair for it.) I'm sure Hubs will bring my yardages of fabric home for me to wear. Last year, I was so confused by the amount of fabric, that I had to go have my neighbor help me. "Michelle, can you help me get dressed?" All she could do was laugh. My cam boot won't be of period dress, but they'll just have to ignore it.
Have a great day!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
My broken foot came with no owner's manual.
After mulling over the Thursday x-ray results, I decided to go pay a visit to Dr. W- to get some details sorted out. Do you know what you do when you start to compile a list of questions? You research on the internet and add to that list.
Dr. W- came in, pulled up a chair and knew we were in for a lovely chat.
"Is my foot actually healing?"
"No."
"Um, okay."
:insert look of concern, confusion and oh crap:
He went on to tell me that x-rays, which are behind the times in giving information, aren't indicating healing, but that isn't to say that there isn't healing on a subcellular level that would be picked up on a different type of scan such as an MRI. He assured me that everything is where it is supposed to be (with visuals and sound effects!) and that I'll have another x-ray on Oct 28, at which point he'll make a determination whether bone growth stimulation needs to be done. No surgery is needed, no pins, no screws and it is just a time thing.
While patting on my unattractive medical gray duck bill aircast boot, "Not that I'm pressing, because I'll be in it for as long as I need, but any time frame?"
"No."
I told him that I read about how it can be a rather slow healing process.
:insert shaking head in agreement:
"Very slow."
He told me that walking on it is fine. I did my two weeks off and walking on it (in the aircast) is actually good for cell growth. He told me not to go all crazy with stuff, but to do what I need to do. When I told him that a coworker wanted to basically strap me down to a stool and not let me up, he said, "Oh, God, no!" I told him that I don't sit very well and people were giving me crap for being up. I also told him that he would be happy to know that though I've been busy trying to coordinate a walkathon for 600ish people, that I won't be walking. "As well you shouldn't be," said my doctor who seems to be understanding my ADD tendencies more and more each visit. His parting words were, "I know when you were in here last time, you were talking about concerns with ladders."
:insert disapproving face:
"Um, yes."
:add in the doctor chuckle:
For some reason, I don't think he trusts me.
Dr. W- came in, pulled up a chair and knew we were in for a lovely chat.
"Is my foot actually healing?"
"No."
"Um, okay."
:insert look of concern, confusion and oh crap:
He went on to tell me that x-rays, which are behind the times in giving information, aren't indicating healing, but that isn't to say that there isn't healing on a subcellular level that would be picked up on a different type of scan such as an MRI. He assured me that everything is where it is supposed to be (with visuals and sound effects!) and that I'll have another x-ray on Oct 28, at which point he'll make a determination whether bone growth stimulation needs to be done. No surgery is needed, no pins, no screws and it is just a time thing.
While patting on my unattractive medical gray duck bill aircast boot, "Not that I'm pressing, because I'll be in it for as long as I need, but any time frame?"
"No."
I told him that I read about how it can be a rather slow healing process.
:insert shaking head in agreement:
"Very slow."
He told me that walking on it is fine. I did my two weeks off and walking on it (in the aircast) is actually good for cell growth. He told me not to go all crazy with stuff, but to do what I need to do. When I told him that a coworker wanted to basically strap me down to a stool and not let me up, he said, "Oh, God, no!" I told him that I don't sit very well and people were giving me crap for being up. I also told him that he would be happy to know that though I've been busy trying to coordinate a walkathon for 600ish people, that I won't be walking. "As well you shouldn't be," said my doctor who seems to be understanding my ADD tendencies more and more each visit. His parting words were, "I know when you were in here last time, you were talking about concerns with ladders."
:insert disapproving face:
"Um, yes."
:add in the doctor chuckle:
For some reason, I don't think he trusts me.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Wendy's Wonderful Kids: One frosty at a time.
Every year now, we purchase the Frosty coupon books for our Halloween trick or treat givies because,
"90 cents of every $1.00 booklet sold between 9/16/11 and 10/31/11 will be donated to support programs like Wendy's Wonderful Kids, a signature program of the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption. . . . You are [also] supporting Wendy's cause of helping foster care children find loving, permanent homes. "
Friday, September 30, 2011
Agony of the foot: The update.
I saw Dr. W today. He and I had a fine discussion about my foot, the fact that the swelling and bruising have subsided nicely and the need to ditch the cast. I talked with him about my job as display staff at a gallery, my need to do pretty intensive display here very shortly and his thoughts about me, my foot and a ladder.
:insert disapproving face:
I told him that my concern was that I am up and down stairs, up and down ladders and quite literally hanging from the ceiling and that standing on a ladder has me rocking right on the part of my foot that I broke.
:insert squinty face:
"Could I break this again?"
With no hesitation whatsoever, "Absolutely." I asked if there was anything that I could put in my shoe to keep my foot from rolling and with a shake of his head and without hesitation in his voice, "No."
The bone breaks easily. It needs a good 6-8 weeks to properly mend. I was farmed off to the fine folks at radiology. After the radiologist took my x-rays, she offered to take me back up to the office in a wheelchair.
"So, it is still broken, huh?"
:insert funky look:
"I know that you couldn't tell me if it was."
"Really, it isn't a problem for me to wheel you up there."
Mmm, hmm.
Dr. W said that the office would phone. Phone they did. "Alignment is still good, but nothing significant has changed. Stay in the boot. The doctor wants to see you back in 4 weeks."
October 28th it is. I'm not disappointed. I'm one who would rather do what we need to do and do it right the first time. When Dr. W was talking, "Well, it is either the boot or orthopedics," I stopped and said, "Really? Orthopedics?" He chuckled and told me that it was far down his list. Very far. Good. Let's keep it that way. Until October 28th or later, we're still bootin'.
Smiles in my day:
- Having an in-depth discussion with Dr. W about the blood clotting disorders, how the MTHFR that I test for is really not anything that effects anything other than making sure that the cholesterol is tended to and kick in a baby aspirin if I want. I told him that I've been doing that, along with a prenatal vitamin for the extra vitamin requirements. He was pleased and I'm glad that we got to discuss it in full and be done with it.
- Having a good talk with K-'s teacher today and a lot of updates on testing that was done.
I've had a pretty intense past few weeks. Gosh, I'm tired. Perhaps the stress will lift soon.
Have a great day!
:insert disapproving face:
I told him that my concern was that I am up and down stairs, up and down ladders and quite literally hanging from the ceiling and that standing on a ladder has me rocking right on the part of my foot that I broke.
:insert squinty face:
"Could I break this again?"
With no hesitation whatsoever, "Absolutely." I asked if there was anything that I could put in my shoe to keep my foot from rolling and with a shake of his head and without hesitation in his voice, "No."
The bone breaks easily. It needs a good 6-8 weeks to properly mend. I was farmed off to the fine folks at radiology. After the radiologist took my x-rays, she offered to take me back up to the office in a wheelchair.
"So, it is still broken, huh?"
:insert funky look:
"I know that you couldn't tell me if it was."
"Really, it isn't a problem for me to wheel you up there."
Mmm, hmm.
Dr. W said that the office would phone. Phone they did. "Alignment is still good, but nothing significant has changed. Stay in the boot. The doctor wants to see you back in 4 weeks."
October 28th it is. I'm not disappointed. I'm one who would rather do what we need to do and do it right the first time. When Dr. W was talking, "Well, it is either the boot or orthopedics," I stopped and said, "Really? Orthopedics?" He chuckled and told me that it was far down his list. Very far. Good. Let's keep it that way. Until October 28th or later, we're still bootin'.
Smiles in my day:
- Having an in-depth discussion with Dr. W about the blood clotting disorders, how the MTHFR that I test for is really not anything that effects anything other than making sure that the cholesterol is tended to and kick in a baby aspirin if I want. I told him that I've been doing that, along with a prenatal vitamin for the extra vitamin requirements. He was pleased and I'm glad that we got to discuss it in full and be done with it.
- Having a good talk with K-'s teacher today and a lot of updates on testing that was done.
I've had a pretty intense past few weeks. Gosh, I'm tired. Perhaps the stress will lift soon.
Have a great day!
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Church homeless.
For the second time in our married life, we have left our church home. In both instances, it was a matter in the making over several years.
The first was in support of our pastor. Our church had dwindled down to 30, people were being all judgmental, up in everyone else's business and when the final straw came, we left along with another couple and the pastor and his wife.
We searched a few churches and after a month and a half, we settled on the church that had been our home for the past 7+ years.
Our pastor at this last church retired 4 1/2 years ago. He is a wonderful man with a kind soul and an ability to tie the bible and current life issues altogether.
We wish he had never retired.
Our current pastor kind of hit us off guard from the beginning. There were things that we didn't agree with, but rolled with the changes anyhow because we figured that everything would mesh a bit eventually.
They never did.
Recently, there has been a lot of rush to judgment going on and instead of embracing members in times of challenge and strife, there are members beating them down. Why wouldn't they want to reach out to them? One of the "them?" She is one of our extremely good friends. What has happened to her was the straw the broke the camels back.
We are at a place that we don't like to be, yet look forward to the opportunity to explore. Neighbors had us visit their Episcopalian church with them a few weeks ago. The church is beautiful and the people are absolutely wonderful. The church service is conducted in a very Catholic manner and while that is certainly not a bad thing, I've grown up Baptist (since the age of 7) and Hubs has been going to the Baptist church with me since we were engaged. We've both been out of it for so long. It was a culture shock of sorts.
K- and I will be hanging at another Baptist church with friends of ours for the next few weeks. They are a small, tight-knit but welcoming congregation that we met at a cook-out this summer. Their pastor is very down to earth. At least we know that these next few weeks, K- and I won't be the only ones bringing a bible to church with us.
In the weeks that follow, we're going to be visiting the Methodist church up the street. They have fantastic children's programming and a Sunday school specifically on CURRENT SOCIAL ISSUES! Hubs was even excited about that! We've been to the church for kids events and are excited to see what a Sunday holds.
We'll be checking out some non-denominational churches. One thing we know is that we aren't in a rush to settle in. We want to find the perfect church home were all of us can feel at ease again. Still, the idea of being church homeless is one that brings me much anxiety. It brings Hubs excitement to see homes that will be a better fit for us and K-.
Pray for us, will you?
The first was in support of our pastor. Our church had dwindled down to 30, people were being all judgmental, up in everyone else's business and when the final straw came, we left along with another couple and the pastor and his wife.
We searched a few churches and after a month and a half, we settled on the church that had been our home for the past 7+ years.
Our pastor at this last church retired 4 1/2 years ago. He is a wonderful man with a kind soul and an ability to tie the bible and current life issues altogether.
We wish he had never retired.
Our current pastor kind of hit us off guard from the beginning. There were things that we didn't agree with, but rolled with the changes anyhow because we figured that everything would mesh a bit eventually.
They never did.
Recently, there has been a lot of rush to judgment going on and instead of embracing members in times of challenge and strife, there are members beating them down. Why wouldn't they want to reach out to them? One of the "them?" She is one of our extremely good friends. What has happened to her was the straw the broke the camels back.
We are at a place that we don't like to be, yet look forward to the opportunity to explore. Neighbors had us visit their Episcopalian church with them a few weeks ago. The church is beautiful and the people are absolutely wonderful. The church service is conducted in a very Catholic manner and while that is certainly not a bad thing, I've grown up Baptist (since the age of 7) and Hubs has been going to the Baptist church with me since we were engaged. We've both been out of it for so long. It was a culture shock of sorts.
K- and I will be hanging at another Baptist church with friends of ours for the next few weeks. They are a small, tight-knit but welcoming congregation that we met at a cook-out this summer. Their pastor is very down to earth. At least we know that these next few weeks, K- and I won't be the only ones bringing a bible to church with us.
In the weeks that follow, we're going to be visiting the Methodist church up the street. They have fantastic children's programming and a Sunday school specifically on CURRENT SOCIAL ISSUES! Hubs was even excited about that! We've been to the church for kids events and are excited to see what a Sunday holds.
We'll be checking out some non-denominational churches. One thing we know is that we aren't in a rush to settle in. We want to find the perfect church home were all of us can feel at ease again. Still, the idea of being church homeless is one that brings me much anxiety. It brings Hubs excitement to see homes that will be a better fit for us and K-.
Pray for us, will you?
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Tales from the Trenches: Ideas one might consider when functioning in public.
1. When you have a cramp in your foot and you decide to take your shoe off in an art gallery, you may want to avoid re-enacting the scene from Planes, Trains and Automobiles where John Candy announces that, "The dogs are really barking tonight." Don't worry. After she stopped waving her shoe around in the air, I asked that she put it back on because it is unsafe to walk through the gallery without shoes on. There could be glass or pins or, God forbid, a bare foot walking around.
2. It's always fun when someone has insisted on being all self-service, drop an art made piece and either display it back on the shelves making us look like we're selling inferior merchandise or, my personal favorite, hiding it. It's like our version of Where's Waldo?
3. When your child has a "po*o*py diaper" and you announce it through the store (though the scent is announcement enough), you might want to consider the carry in-carry out rule that several state parks have. Changing said diaper in a small, one seater, equal to your home 1/2 bath if you live in an old house 1/2 bath, is fine. When leaving said biohazard in the trash, it stinks up the whole joint. We're not talking just the bathroom, but it makes the WHOLE joint smell bad.
4. When you keep asking a chick with a broken foot to come back and get things out of a case for you, they may get a little irritated on the 10th trip because you had no ability to make up your mind and even then, you announced that you'd be back next month and we won't be surprised to see that very same pair of earrings come back.
5. Mind your children. Really. When you buy them something and they rip it from the package, could you hand me the package pieces to throw away. Littering a Goldie Locks path (ETA: Hansel and Gretel) out the door with bits of plastic and paper isn't something necessary. We're pretty close to the parking lot. I don't think you'll have a problem finding how to get back in again.
6. Don't be offended by being asked if you want a gift receipt. I know you think that the flaming pink flamingo earrings are a perfect fit for everyone, but not everyone will embrace them. I know it is a shock, but people do return things. They might even return the perfect gifts that you've given. Shocking, I know.
7. I know that I've said this before, but when you wear enough perfume to choke a clydsedale, you may want to consider toning it down a bit. When we still smell your perfume in the gallery two hours after you have left, that is going beyond having a personal scent. Consider a few things. First, perfume does have a shelf date. It can go bad. Believe me. Secondly, there are people who like to breathe. I'm just saying. Breathing is good.
8. If the toilet paper is low and you notice it, I realize that it isn't your job to tell me. However, there are occasions that we check in the morning, we are well stocked and bless the people and their many bathrooming needs. Just let us know if we need to do some tending. Again, a sensitive matter that people don't like to do and I'm not mad about it (or anything else listed here-- irritated, maybe), but think of your fellow shoppers. There's no next door stall to knock on to see if they can spare a square. Bummer, dude.
9. Step away from your phone.
10. Buckeyes are not chestnuts. Pick all you want but NO, you cannot eat them. I understand critters eat them, but don't. eat. the. buckeyes.
11. I'm happy to throw your cup away. You needn't display it on the shelf with the other art. No, really. You may be famous one day, but until then, no one is considering purchasing your used beverage cup.
12. We know that we write slips by hand and that our credit card system is analog and goes slower than the Pony Express. However, as charming as you may find that it isn't, I can't do anything about it. We aren't going computerized. Think of it as small business charm. Besides, if you asked to have a $1.50 ornament wrapped at Target, they would think that you are crazy. We may think that it is crazy to wrap the $1.50 ornament, but at least we'll do it. See? A nice trade, eh?
13. I know that it is particularly difficult, but do your best to park between the lines. They are yellow and bright and you don't need to double park your car in the front lot that holds all of 10 cars. If you feel the need to double park your car, you can park it on the street where no one can park next to it.
14. If you are an artist with an appointment to show your items, don't just show up any ole day and think that it is okay. Art school 101 tells you that you need to 1. make an appointment and not just drop by and that 2. keep said appointment. Not everyone who was going to meet with you is on schedule or available for your drop-in time.
15. If you are an artist who crafts things specifically for children, don't be offended by my asking about the tiny little buttons that you have on your items or lead standards for your pieces. You are embellishing commercially made items with tiny buttons with no okay for lead. Telling me that the buttons are antique and that that you assume that "since you bought the things in the store that they must be okay," isn't good enough. They sell things chalked full of lead or cadmium all the time. I stopped selling my items because of CPSIA guidelines. Though I talked to manufacturers about lack of lead and so forth, I couldn't be positive that the store hadn't sold me old lead-laden stock. To avoid being sued, I stopped selling my work all together. Keep in mind that I bring up the tiny little buttons on your items as a choking hazard because it isn't good to hand things off to babies that they may chew off, no matter how well they are sewn on. (Follow the toilet paper tube rule.) I know that your small child is probably not an eater and mine wasn't either, but there are plenty of them out there. There are also standards. That is why I'm not dogging on your work, I'm just not trying to kill a kid with it.
2. It's always fun when someone has insisted on being all self-service, drop an art made piece and either display it back on the shelves making us look like we're selling inferior merchandise or, my personal favorite, hiding it. It's like our version of Where's Waldo?
3. When your child has a "po*o*py diaper" and you announce it through the store (though the scent is announcement enough), you might want to consider the carry in-carry out rule that several state parks have. Changing said diaper in a small, one seater, equal to your home 1/2 bath if you live in an old house 1/2 bath, is fine. When leaving said biohazard in the trash, it stinks up the whole joint. We're not talking just the bathroom, but it makes the WHOLE joint smell bad.
4. When you keep asking a chick with a broken foot to come back and get things out of a case for you, they may get a little irritated on the 10th trip because you had no ability to make up your mind and even then, you announced that you'd be back next month and we won't be surprised to see that very same pair of earrings come back.
5. Mind your children. Really. When you buy them something and they rip it from the package, could you hand me the package pieces to throw away. Littering a Goldie Locks path (ETA: Hansel and Gretel) out the door with bits of plastic and paper isn't something necessary. We're pretty close to the parking lot. I don't think you'll have a problem finding how to get back in again.
6. Don't be offended by being asked if you want a gift receipt. I know you think that the flaming pink flamingo earrings are a perfect fit for everyone, but not everyone will embrace them. I know it is a shock, but people do return things. They might even return the perfect gifts that you've given. Shocking, I know.
7. I know that I've said this before, but when you wear enough perfume to choke a clydsedale, you may want to consider toning it down a bit. When we still smell your perfume in the gallery two hours after you have left, that is going beyond having a personal scent. Consider a few things. First, perfume does have a shelf date. It can go bad. Believe me. Secondly, there are people who like to breathe. I'm just saying. Breathing is good.
8. If the toilet paper is low and you notice it, I realize that it isn't your job to tell me. However, there are occasions that we check in the morning, we are well stocked and bless the people and their many bathrooming needs. Just let us know if we need to do some tending. Again, a sensitive matter that people don't like to do and I'm not mad about it (or anything else listed here-- irritated, maybe), but think of your fellow shoppers. There's no next door stall to knock on to see if they can spare a square. Bummer, dude.
9. Step away from your phone.
10. Buckeyes are not chestnuts. Pick all you want but NO, you cannot eat them. I understand critters eat them, but don't. eat. the. buckeyes.
11. I'm happy to throw your cup away. You needn't display it on the shelf with the other art. No, really. You may be famous one day, but until then, no one is considering purchasing your used beverage cup.
12. We know that we write slips by hand and that our credit card system is analog and goes slower than the Pony Express. However, as charming as you may find that it isn't, I can't do anything about it. We aren't going computerized. Think of it as small business charm. Besides, if you asked to have a $1.50 ornament wrapped at Target, they would think that you are crazy. We may think that it is crazy to wrap the $1.50 ornament, but at least we'll do it. See? A nice trade, eh?
13. I know that it is particularly difficult, but do your best to park between the lines. They are yellow and bright and you don't need to double park your car in the front lot that holds all of 10 cars. If you feel the need to double park your car, you can park it on the street where no one can park next to it.
14. If you are an artist with an appointment to show your items, don't just show up any ole day and think that it is okay. Art school 101 tells you that you need to 1. make an appointment and not just drop by and that 2. keep said appointment. Not everyone who was going to meet with you is on schedule or available for your drop-in time.
15. If you are an artist who crafts things specifically for children, don't be offended by my asking about the tiny little buttons that you have on your items or lead standards for your pieces. You are embellishing commercially made items with tiny buttons with no okay for lead. Telling me that the buttons are antique and that that you assume that "since you bought the things in the store that they must be okay," isn't good enough. They sell things chalked full of lead or cadmium all the time. I stopped selling my items because of CPSIA guidelines. Though I talked to manufacturers about lack of lead and so forth, I couldn't be positive that the store hadn't sold me old lead-laden stock. To avoid being sued, I stopped selling my work all together. Keep in mind that I bring up the tiny little buttons on your items as a choking hazard because it isn't good to hand things off to babies that they may chew off, no matter how well they are sewn on. (Follow the toilet paper tube rule.) I know that your small child is probably not an eater and mine wasn't either, but there are plenty of them out there. There are also standards. That is why I'm not dogging on your work, I'm just not trying to kill a kid with it.
The end.
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