My yearly dilemma is this-- are the cherries ready yet? I've given it a few good weeks since I first started seeing them in the stores. The price has dropped, so I'm thinking that is probably when the larger influx of cherries are coming in.
I bought K a little bag. Then I kindly told her that I paid almost $4.00 for them and to please eat them.
:with tears:
Aunt Donna would always call and say that they were ready and once again, I'm left to guessing. :(
I hit another milestone today. I had to buy my child sidewalk chalk. Because Aunt Donna bought her multiple containers each year and the last one being some giant Crayola bucket that lasted YEARS, I haven't bought chalk in more years than I can think to say. I had to run up to the local discount store this evening and they had some buckets 2 for 99 cents. I bought two and brought them home. K has been working with the dregs lately and I've known that there was a need. She was thrilled to see the new chalk come in the door. I made her promise to use one bucket at a time and not to grind all of it up at once to make chalk "paint." Still, another Aunt Donna thing. :(
I saw someone on a red scooter the other day. Since it was toodling around here, it could have been hers. Right before she passed away, LeAnne and I received several calls of scooter break downs. The last big call was when my sister was on her way to a function and could not come to Aunt Donna's rescue. She asked that I go. Hubs happened to be home and came with me. We hunted her down, found the old girl and the broken scooter and Hubs told me to check on the back for some switch to flip. We did and magically it was alive! Aunt Donna made me give her tactile instructions (she was legally blind) and she was off.
We miss her and not just because she provided sidewalk chalk and "the cherries are ready" calls. She was a pain in the patoot and certainly as hard headed as I am. (Geeze, where did I get it?) However, she would give anything to anyone and had the habit of being taken advantage of. She knew that I was one of the few in her life that would not take advantage of her and truly watched out for her. Sometimes, the old girl was a lot of work. Her heart was in the right place.
We miss her a lot.
Showing posts with label Aunt Donna. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Aunt Donna. Show all posts
Monday, June 10, 2013
Monday, July 2, 2012
We finally bought cherries.
Neither one of us could do it. Cherries remind us too much of Aunt Donna and we've been having a bit of a rough time. K- and I had a long talk. We talked about how much we missed quirky Aunt Donna and now was the time for us to bite the bullet and buy cherries.
The child is in heaven.
Cherries will always be a huge reminder of Aunt Donna for both of us, be it the phone calls of readiness, or spotting K- and Aunt D as they spit cherry seeds over the 7th floor balcony of her apartment.
The woman was an odd bird. She made her knowledge (or perceived knowledge) of all things known and if she announced that she knew something, she was under the impression that she was THE authority. Still, if you were sick, hurt, injured or in need in any way, Aunt Donna came to the rescue. She was a disabled, sight impaired woman who truly lived on a fixed income, but somehow, she'd make it all work. She would drop off bags on my doorstep of a variety of fruits and vegetables. She'd scooter over with a freezer bag to drop off popscicles. She managed to buy my sister two vans, since one she flipped, rolled and destroyed. She would picnic in the party room with us and a cheap Little Caesar's pizza.
How she delighted in spending time with our kids.
Truly, she is very missed. For now, though, we have cherries in the fridge. Apparently, they are good. (I don't like cherries.) Aunt Donna would be proud.
The child is in heaven.
Cherries will always be a huge reminder of Aunt Donna for both of us, be it the phone calls of readiness, or spotting K- and Aunt D as they spit cherry seeds over the 7th floor balcony of her apartment.
The woman was an odd bird. She made her knowledge (or perceived knowledge) of all things known and if she announced that she knew something, she was under the impression that she was THE authority. Still, if you were sick, hurt, injured or in need in any way, Aunt Donna came to the rescue. She was a disabled, sight impaired woman who truly lived on a fixed income, but somehow, she'd make it all work. She would drop off bags on my doorstep of a variety of fruits and vegetables. She'd scooter over with a freezer bag to drop off popscicles. She managed to buy my sister two vans, since one she flipped, rolled and destroyed. She would picnic in the party room with us and a cheap Little Caesar's pizza.
How she delighted in spending time with our kids.
Truly, she is very missed. For now, though, we have cherries in the fridge. Apparently, they are good. (I don't like cherries.) Aunt Donna would be proud.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
A walk down memory lane.
LeAnne and I worked on Aunt Donna's memory boards this weekend. We'll be having her Celebration of Life on Tuesday, and we really wanted to get this handled. While we walked down that road, we talked, we cried, we laughed, then our Billy made us laugh to tears. Thank goodness for text, the ability to send photos by phone (thanks for being a good sport, Rachael), and my brother's true sense of humor coming to the rescue when our weariness and sadness were getting the better of us.
I admit that in the interest of getting these to fit on one scan, I have the ages in a bit of a hodge podge.
I admit that in the interest of getting these to fit on one scan, I have the ages in a bit of a hodge podge.
Numerically speaking, here goes:
1. My sister (who my niece J- looks remarkably like in this photo) is quite excited about a new pair of pleather zip-up boots while I, being surrounded by Tiddly Winks and a Charlie's Angel game am trying to figure out how to get that radio dog to work with nobs in places that I only recalled puppies to feed. Yes, I did like Orange Crush. Yes, it was the 70's. Thank you for asking. Age? Probably 6.
2. I was in the dugout at a ball game. I don't recall this one, but I have to say that I was kinda cute. I'm thinking that I was rockin' the age of 3 here.
3. Oh yes. The elephant ride. There's a better photo on the board, but Aunt Donna took LeAnne and me to ride an elephant at the circus. I recall having been so excited that it was all I could talk about. I was determined that I was going to have an elephant as a pet. My parents were unable to talk me out of it, so they bought me a Weeble Circus as a consolation prize. When that didn't work, Mom wrote a book, submitted it to Golden Book and it got rejected. I still have the book. I have it put up and would like to have it printed and bound. Here, I'm about 3.
4. My text to several was that yes, we did go to Mom's Cuts. Mom's response back was that we should be glad that she was such a talent with the shears. My text back to her was a photo of my sister clearly looking as if she had been adopted into the Family Yoder, had been trained to work in the field and had become quite adept at her outhousing skills. In all seriousness, my Aunt Donna took us for photos. I was 6, LeAnne was 9 and Billy was 2. This photo hung on her wall for as long as we could remember. Well, at least up until about the last decade it hung on her wall.
5. 4th grade. My brother told me that I looked like a dork. I told him that when you are rockin' the hair and teeth that I had at the time (spent years in prep for braces and braces themselves), you rock what you've got. His text back was that at least I have teeth. I laughed to tears. You see, he got one of his teeth knocked out somehow (I don't want to know) and being in between insurance, he just has to go with a big front tooth and a half. At least he owns the fact that he's looking a little off right now. The tears of laughter did flow.
6. 1st grade. I found this dress in another photo of my sister or cousin at my uncle's wedding. I think that I've figured out that this was the flower girl dress for my Uncle Billy's wedding. He and my aunt had "Stairway to Heaven" played as she walked down the aisle. While I didn't have that played at my wedding, I did have "Thank You" partially printed on our wedding invites and we did dance to that at our wedding reception. It made me think of Uncle Billy. It made me smile.
7. My guess is that I was three here. Look. I mean, really look. Could no one correct the fact that my skirt was way hiked up BEFORE they took the photo? And Santa, was it necessary for you to wear all that rouge? Wow!
We discovered that my Aunt Donna was less than a stellar student. Her report cards were suffering. She did have a great sense of humor and we found so many photos of her on her graduation day. She was in a dress and heels and they probably figured it was the last time that would ever happen, so they took many, many photos of her. (Aunt Donna was a les#bi*an.) We found a photo of her in a bikini, work ID's, her being the shirtless tom girl that we weren't surprised at, more photos than I can count of her smoking up a storm (I guess that I forgot that she smoked), in a professional baseball uniform (she played pro ball for a while), hugging my grandma, cooking on an open fire, fishing and having a great time being herself.
How so sad we are that we don't have her around anymore. She was a stubborn mule, but life is just not the same without her.
We've had a hard time with the excessive time that has passed since she passed away and her Celebration of Life. We held off so that her previous partner of 25 years would be able to attend (she had just had a hysterectomy the day that Aunt Donna passed away.) They had broken up in a horrible divorce-style break-up, but in the past year or so, they reconciled, renewed their friendship and had been talking quite a bit. To leave Marcia out seemed wrong. Still, the time lapse has nearly killed LeAnne, me and the kids.
To get her celebration finalized and actually happening takes us to a point of closure. Sad closure, mind you, but closure.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Tales from the Trenches: How am I going to know when the cherries are ready?
Aunt Donna had a love for cherries. She shared that love with K-. I would get weekly calls. "Amy, the cherries aren't ready yet." "Aimmmmmmmm-eeeee! The cherries are ready! Bring K- over and I have some for her."
Aunt Donna taught K- how to spit cherry seeds. Now, it sounds and is a disgusting habit, but I figured if that was what they were going to do, I'd at least spot them so that they didn't hit pedestrians with flying cherry pits/seeds. "Hold on. Hold on. Okay-- now!" They would sit on her bench, spit them from the 7th floor balcony and you would hear the little 'ting' when they hit.
On Sunday, I was walking through the produce section with K-. Tears suddenly started running down my face. "K-, how are we going to know when the cherries are ready?"
Aunt Donna taught K- how to spit cherry seeds. Now, it sounds and is a disgusting habit, but I figured if that was what they were going to do, I'd at least spot them so that they didn't hit pedestrians with flying cherry pits/seeds. "Hold on. Hold on. Okay-- now!" They would sit on her bench, spit them from the 7th floor balcony and you would hear the little 'ting' when they hit.
On Sunday, I was walking through the produce section with K-. Tears suddenly started running down my face. "K-, how are we going to know when the cherries are ready?"
Saturday, February 4, 2012
It upsets me that I can't fulfill her final wishes.
My aunt had no will, but stated to many what her final wishes were. Because she had no will, I, who she wanted to handle all of the material possessions and final arrangements, cannot do that. Within minutes of her death being called in the field by the EMT's, I was asked for the keys and her wallet. I was also told that I didn't have to stay and I could go ahead and leave. The EMT's looked at me as I explained, "Um, I was here when she died. I'm sure that I'm not supposed to leave quite yet." :EMT shaking head: They wanted to start ransacking the joint before she had even lost warmth.
Who is they? That would be Bill and his wife.
He kept asking, "Amy, where is the box?" He wanted a silver box that were to contain Aunt Donna's final papers.
I don't have the box.
He's called friends. They've called me and said that they were asked, "Where's the box?"
The box questions have ended. Frankly, I think that in the ransacking of the apartment, he found the cash stashes that he was looking for. All of the blank check books are gone. I have concern about that, but handled the things at the bank as Aunt Donna instructed me to.
It is one steaming pile of poo. It's not how Aunt Donna wanted things handled. She wanted my sister and I to handle everything and wanted her brother to have nothing and yet because she failed to state her wishes legally, he will take and take.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not here with my hand out. I care nothing about physical possessions. He can have at it with the medical equipment, used lift chair and the Golden Girls couch. What bothers me is that I know that Aunt Donna wanted these things to be handled not just as thrift possessions, but as the life possessions that she had amassed and as such, she wanted good things to happen to them/with them.
She would give anything she had to anyone.
She would share anything she had with anyone.
We knew that that's what she wanted done. Instead, I come in to a bedroom that was ransacked for cash. I get occasional calls about the missing bilfold she had.
The woman had very little and yet what she had is being amassed in a pile of gambling driven greed.
"Oh, I know that she wanted to have trusts put up for all the kids and that WILL be done." What kind of idiot do you think I am?
I was with her at the very end. I was present for her last breath. I called 911-- twice. I relayed info from her, then about her. I, despite her size, still tried to roll her over to do CPR. I dragged furniture and dead mobility scooters out of the way with the EMTs. I watched them try to revive her. I went down 7 floors to let the additional engine company come in to help lift her lifeless body. I was there when her time of death was called in the field. I was questioned by the EMT's. I was questioned by the police. I didn't panic. I wasn't hysterical. I did what I had to do. It's with that that I can walk away and know that though not in death, but in life I did all I could do for her. I rest knowing that the promise that I made to my grandmother while she was on her deathbed was that I would take care of Aunt Donna. Within 10 minutes of being told that, her labored breathing had slowed and she went home to be with the Lord. I carried out my promise and know that I made two women as happy as I could.
With this, that's all that matters. God's will, as I had prayed it, was done. Aunt Donna felt no pain. She was not suffering. Her heart stopped and she just stopped being. It was peaceful and it was like she just fell asleep. I could have asked for nothing else for her.
Now we're left to grieve. I haven't been able to do that before today. I've been on auto pilot. K-, on the other hand, has moments where she just crumbles and cries. You see, K- and Aunt Donna had been two peas in their own pod from the time K- was 4 days old. The two went toodling on Aunt Donna's scooter, then when old enough, they would run races in the parking lot. Aunt Donna would be on her scooter and K- would be on foot. K- finally got big enough and fast enough that Aunt Donna, scooter full throttle, would have to cheat and sneak in between cars. All the ladies in the building know her and she would hang and sometimes try to help them with their puzzles. She was the mail retriever. Aunt Donna had taken her for so many years that finally she was old enough to go the 7 floors down, get the mail and come back up. Aunt Donna would scooter over with sidewalk chalk and cherry tomatoes for K-. She'd sometimes scooter over while I was at work and leave a bag of Aunt Donna offerings on the door.
Life just isn't going to be the same without the old girl.
Who is they? That would be Bill and his wife.
He kept asking, "Amy, where is the box?" He wanted a silver box that were to contain Aunt Donna's final papers.
I don't have the box.
He's called friends. They've called me and said that they were asked, "Where's the box?"
The box questions have ended. Frankly, I think that in the ransacking of the apartment, he found the cash stashes that he was looking for. All of the blank check books are gone. I have concern about that, but handled the things at the bank as Aunt Donna instructed me to.
It is one steaming pile of poo. It's not how Aunt Donna wanted things handled. She wanted my sister and I to handle everything and wanted her brother to have nothing and yet because she failed to state her wishes legally, he will take and take.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not here with my hand out. I care nothing about physical possessions. He can have at it with the medical equipment, used lift chair and the Golden Girls couch. What bothers me is that I know that Aunt Donna wanted these things to be handled not just as thrift possessions, but as the life possessions that she had amassed and as such, she wanted good things to happen to them/with them.
She would give anything she had to anyone.
She would share anything she had with anyone.
We knew that that's what she wanted done. Instead, I come in to a bedroom that was ransacked for cash. I get occasional calls about the missing bilfold she had.
The woman had very little and yet what she had is being amassed in a pile of gambling driven greed.
"Oh, I know that she wanted to have trusts put up for all the kids and that WILL be done." What kind of idiot do you think I am?
I was with her at the very end. I was present for her last breath. I called 911-- twice. I relayed info from her, then about her. I, despite her size, still tried to roll her over to do CPR. I dragged furniture and dead mobility scooters out of the way with the EMTs. I watched them try to revive her. I went down 7 floors to let the additional engine company come in to help lift her lifeless body. I was there when her time of death was called in the field. I was questioned by the EMT's. I was questioned by the police. I didn't panic. I wasn't hysterical. I did what I had to do. It's with that that I can walk away and know that though not in death, but in life I did all I could do for her. I rest knowing that the promise that I made to my grandmother while she was on her deathbed was that I would take care of Aunt Donna. Within 10 minutes of being told that, her labored breathing had slowed and she went home to be with the Lord. I carried out my promise and know that I made two women as happy as I could.
With this, that's all that matters. God's will, as I had prayed it, was done. Aunt Donna felt no pain. She was not suffering. Her heart stopped and she just stopped being. It was peaceful and it was like she just fell asleep. I could have asked for nothing else for her.
Now we're left to grieve. I haven't been able to do that before today. I've been on auto pilot. K-, on the other hand, has moments where she just crumbles and cries. You see, K- and Aunt Donna had been two peas in their own pod from the time K- was 4 days old. The two went toodling on Aunt Donna's scooter, then when old enough, they would run races in the parking lot. Aunt Donna would be on her scooter and K- would be on foot. K- finally got big enough and fast enough that Aunt Donna, scooter full throttle, would have to cheat and sneak in between cars. All the ladies in the building know her and she would hang and sometimes try to help them with their puzzles. She was the mail retriever. Aunt Donna had taken her for so many years that finally she was old enough to go the 7 floors down, get the mail and come back up. Aunt Donna would scooter over with sidewalk chalk and cherry tomatoes for K-. She'd sometimes scooter over while I was at work and leave a bag of Aunt Donna offerings on the door.
Life just isn't going to be the same without the old girl.
Thursday, February 2, 2012
And the gate opened and she walked right in.
Her body is whole. She is free of pain. This evening, skipping a long and very sorted story which involves me, 911 and my aunt's lack of breathing, she went home. She went home to be with her Lord and Savior.
I'm okay. Certainly wasn't something that I signed up for, but the Lord put me where I was supposed to be.
I'm okay. Certainly wasn't something that I signed up for, but the Lord put me where I was supposed to be.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
A list! Things you didn't want to know about the last few days.
1. I'm new at blogging from the Kindle and their auto-correct is hilarious. Yes, I know that there is an empty 10, but I couldn't figure out how to get the Kindle to scroll down the rest of the way. I can tell you what it was, though. Our crocus' seem to be confused. The warm weather has made them peek their heads above the soil.
2. I always have the habit of checking the public bathroom when I open the store. After the weekend, I can sometimes find some lovelies in there. At Christmas, I found that someone flushed an air freshened. It was those little gel balls and someone emptied it into the toilet. I have no idea what possessed them to do that. Monday, I came in to find a "gift" on the floor. Wow,that started my day off grrrreat!
3. I'm eating a cold lunch because my coworker has to heat each thing individually and it literally takes 10 minutes for her to do it. Think I'm kidding, just ask Nicole!
4. I have a coworker who needs to seriously retire.
5. My bio dad felt the need to hug me today in front of a roomful of strangers and to loudly announce that he loves me. I told him that I loved him just to make the awkwardness stop.
6. It was warm enough outside yesterday to lie on the sidewalk and enjoy the warmth.
7. The windows were open at the house all day yesterday.
8. Since this post is several days in the making, so my aunt's update comes here. The breast lumpectomy was done today. It was successful, they believe that they got everything and the lymph nodes that were removed appear to test fine at this moment.
9. The smell of my grandfather's cherry tobacco pipe enveloped me at one point. I felt Poppy's presence and boy did I need that. That was yesterday and I was a bit fatigued from all of the stuff with my aunt.
10.
2. I always have the habit of checking the public bathroom when I open the store. After the weekend, I can sometimes find some lovelies in there. At Christmas, I found that someone flushed an air freshened. It was those little gel balls and someone emptied it into the toilet. I have no idea what possessed them to do that. Monday, I came in to find a "gift" on the floor. Wow,that started my day off grrrreat!
3. I'm eating a cold lunch because my coworker has to heat each thing individually and it literally takes 10 minutes for her to do it. Think I'm kidding, just ask Nicole!
4. I have a coworker who needs to seriously retire.
5. My bio dad felt the need to hug me today in front of a roomful of strangers and to loudly announce that he loves me. I told him that I loved him just to make the awkwardness stop.
6. It was warm enough outside yesterday to lie on the sidewalk and enjoy the warmth.
7. The windows were open at the house all day yesterday.
8. Since this post is several days in the making, so my aunt's update comes here. The breast lumpectomy was done today. It was successful, they believe that they got everything and the lymph nodes that were removed appear to test fine at this moment.
9. The smell of my grandfather's cherry tobacco pipe enveloped me at one point. I felt Poppy's presence and boy did I need that. That was yesterday and I was a bit fatigued from all of the stuff with my aunt.
10.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Because there is a Polar Pop out there with my name on it.
First, Aunt Donna's procedure went well. They were able to remove her tumor by doing a colonoscopy and doing it that way. They couldn't do it at the initial colonoscopy because they needed to get some tools to perform the procedure that they didn't have. We're glad that it was basically as minimally invasive as possible. Aunt Donna had herself all thinking that parts of colon or intestine were being removed and that rehab would be necessary.
Thankfully, not so. Her procedure (wasn't full on surgery) was supposed to be at 7:30 AM so I arrived at 6:25 AM to find her no where around. She had been rolled down at 5:50 AM, so I had to hunt down the colonoscopy room and hang out there.
Bill was fine and I'm thankful for the word search app on the Kindle. It took the awkwardness of the situation away.
Tomorrow, she'll be having the lumpectomy on her breast done. I believe that to be true since it actually came out of a physicians mouth. Lord only knows what time I'll need to be up and out for that. I'm good with it. Don't think I'm not. I wouldn't consider not being there for her, but caffeine-- oh it shall be my friend.
With that, it is supposed to be a freakishly warm 60 degree day. Pardon me as I go crack a few windows open. I long for fresh air.
Keep the prayers coming. Thanks so much!
Thankfully, not so. Her procedure (wasn't full on surgery) was supposed to be at 7:30 AM so I arrived at 6:25 AM to find her no where around. She had been rolled down at 5:50 AM, so I had to hunt down the colonoscopy room and hang out there.
Bill was fine and I'm thankful for the word search app on the Kindle. It took the awkwardness of the situation away.
Tomorrow, she'll be having the lumpectomy on her breast done. I believe that to be true since it actually came out of a physicians mouth. Lord only knows what time I'll need to be up and out for that. I'm good with it. Don't think I'm not. I wouldn't consider not being there for her, but caffeine-- oh it shall be my friend.
With that, it is supposed to be a freakishly warm 60 degree day. Pardon me as I go crack a few windows open. I long for fresh air.
Keep the prayers coming. Thanks so much!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Aunt Donna's surgery tomorrow!
Bless the ole girl. They told her that she would have surgery tomorrow @7:30 AM and she didn't ask important questions like how long, where will I be after or anything. She's just excited to get this finally done. As for me, I'll be enjoying an akward wait time with her brother, my biological father who I disowned at 15, was adopted and had a legal name change. It's not about me and I'm hoping that we can continue being cordial as we've managed for the last many years.
Prayers, please!
Prayers, please!
Friday, January 27, 2012
A heaping helping of frustration.
This is my aunt's 8th day in the hospital. During that time, we've been given highs, lows and in-betweens.
She was told Monday that her tumor that was found was cancerous.
She was told Tuesday or Wednesday that it was precancerous.
She was told Tuesday that she had a spot on her lung and one in her right breast. Nothing to worry about. Probably calcium deposit in the breast and perhaps asbestos in the lung.
She was sent down for a mammogram on Wednesday and the tech told her that it looked suspicious and like it was cancer. Oh, the term was changed from spot to mass.
They decided that they had to have a biopsy of it. Aunt Donna said that they could do it when they do her surgery to remove the rectal tumor. They came Thursday afternoon and did it in her room.
Today she was told that she has three additional "lumps" that they have found, one place being her pancreas.
Today she was told that the "spot" on her lung needed to be biopsied and they will be doing that tomorrow.
Cancer, no cancer, cancer, no cancer, cancer . . .
She is looking towards surgery possibly Wednesday. She's wanting them to remove what they can remove and have radiation or chemotherapy. She's repeated that several times. By what she said that the doctor has said, it doesn't look like any of those three are truly the options that they are looking at.
Frankly, I do think that my aunt is full of cancer. They could carve and chop her up like a pumpkin, but at this point, I don't know that it would make a huge difference.
Each phone call gives a different answer. She says that once she hangs the phone up, the doctors come in and tell her something else.
What is worse is how I currently feel about what would be good news that she gave me. You see, my biological father (her brother), came to her the other day and said that he is now a Christian. While I think that it is grand that he is saved, I admit questioning his motives. As a Christian, I feel horrible about this. I talked to Mom about it, who was married to the man and could confirm or deny my feelings. My mom's bit, "Well, I hope that we're both wrong." Apparently, he had done this once with her. You see, my aunt is a very devote Christian. To tell her that you are a Christian as well gets her singing praises to the Lord the way that any good Baptist would. Sadly, we live in a fallen world. As such, some people aren't quite as pure and full of integrity with their announcements of such devotion to our Lord and Savior. My thoughts, and I hate that I go there with it, is that he has told her that so that he can "get in good with her" before she dies. I suspect that he believes that if he speaks to her in her love language, that he'll be the recipient of all her earthly goods when she passes.
Aunt Donna is an old woman with not a whole lotta much.
My sister frustrates me with her continual complaining to Aunt Donna about things that she and her children don't have. Of course, this prompts Aunt Donna to be the fixer (middle child) and do what she can for my sister, even if it would be her last cent. My aunt has been trying to contact my sister from the hospital. My sister has phones that she said need to be replaced. Now, she's known this for a while. My aunt has finally gotten so frustrated that she sent me out today to spend $60.00 on new phones for my sister. It gripes me to no end that the wanting doesn't seem to cease.
My mom phoned my aunt and prayed with her. Mom said that Aunt Donna pleaded to God for healing. Miracles do and can happen. Who am I to stand in the way of her pleading?
I'm frustrated because this isn't my first time at the rodeo. I walked my grandmother (Mom's mom) through colon cancer. My aunt (Mom's sister) was prayed for and with through brain cancer. My grandmother (Aunt Donna's mom) was prayed for and with regarding her small cell lymphoma. This rodeo looks like a duck. It's walking like a duck. I fear that it is a big, massed out duck.
This one I can't fix, even if I am a middle child.
She was told Monday that her tumor that was found was cancerous.
She was told Tuesday or Wednesday that it was precancerous.
She was told Tuesday that she had a spot on her lung and one in her right breast. Nothing to worry about. Probably calcium deposit in the breast and perhaps asbestos in the lung.
She was sent down for a mammogram on Wednesday and the tech told her that it looked suspicious and like it was cancer. Oh, the term was changed from spot to mass.
They decided that they had to have a biopsy of it. Aunt Donna said that they could do it when they do her surgery to remove the rectal tumor. They came Thursday afternoon and did it in her room.
Today she was told that she has three additional "lumps" that they have found, one place being her pancreas.
Today she was told that the "spot" on her lung needed to be biopsied and they will be doing that tomorrow.
Cancer, no cancer, cancer, no cancer, cancer . . .
She is looking towards surgery possibly Wednesday. She's wanting them to remove what they can remove and have radiation or chemotherapy. She's repeated that several times. By what she said that the doctor has said, it doesn't look like any of those three are truly the options that they are looking at.
Frankly, I do think that my aunt is full of cancer. They could carve and chop her up like a pumpkin, but at this point, I don't know that it would make a huge difference.
Each phone call gives a different answer. She says that once she hangs the phone up, the doctors come in and tell her something else.
What is worse is how I currently feel about what would be good news that she gave me. You see, my biological father (her brother), came to her the other day and said that he is now a Christian. While I think that it is grand that he is saved, I admit questioning his motives. As a Christian, I feel horrible about this. I talked to Mom about it, who was married to the man and could confirm or deny my feelings. My mom's bit, "Well, I hope that we're both wrong." Apparently, he had done this once with her. You see, my aunt is a very devote Christian. To tell her that you are a Christian as well gets her singing praises to the Lord the way that any good Baptist would. Sadly, we live in a fallen world. As such, some people aren't quite as pure and full of integrity with their announcements of such devotion to our Lord and Savior. My thoughts, and I hate that I go there with it, is that he has told her that so that he can "get in good with her" before she dies. I suspect that he believes that if he speaks to her in her love language, that he'll be the recipient of all her earthly goods when she passes.
Aunt Donna is an old woman with not a whole lotta much.
My sister frustrates me with her continual complaining to Aunt Donna about things that she and her children don't have. Of course, this prompts Aunt Donna to be the fixer (middle child) and do what she can for my sister, even if it would be her last cent. My aunt has been trying to contact my sister from the hospital. My sister has phones that she said need to be replaced. Now, she's known this for a while. My aunt has finally gotten so frustrated that she sent me out today to spend $60.00 on new phones for my sister. It gripes me to no end that the wanting doesn't seem to cease.
My mom phoned my aunt and prayed with her. Mom said that Aunt Donna pleaded to God for healing. Miracles do and can happen. Who am I to stand in the way of her pleading?
I'm frustrated because this isn't my first time at the rodeo. I walked my grandmother (Mom's mom) through colon cancer. My aunt (Mom's sister) was prayed for and with through brain cancer. My grandmother (Aunt Donna's mom) was prayed for and with regarding her small cell lymphoma. This rodeo looks like a duck. It's walking like a duck. I fear that it is a big, massed out duck.
This one I can't fix, even if I am a middle child.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
The Tooth Fairy needs you! Foreign coin ID, please.
HELP!
1. Says something to the effect of Confederatio Helvetica.-- SWITZERLAND!
2. Looks potentially Russian.
3. and 5. Looks potentially Russian.
4. Says Deutschland on it. -- GERMANY!
She's gotten a Euro, money from Turkey and pence from Scotland. With the snaggle toothy front tooth that is twisting and just dangling there (I've encouraged her to pull it, but nope), she'll be enjoying some money from Panama. I also have money from the Bahamas.
Lend a hand to the tooth fairy, will you? Thanks!
Aunt Donna update: She had a mammogram which labeled the spot on her breast as a "mass" and it needs biopsied. Though she was originally denied surgery for the rectal tumor, she now is cleared by the cardiologist. (Calcium deposits on her heart.) She has a spot on her lung, but goodness knows what that is. Honestly, it sounds as if she has the small cell lymphoma that my grandma had and it has cropped up in several places. I know that they said that the colon bit is precancerous, but other things have cropped up and it doesn't seem like dots are connecting to me. Her request is that we pray God's will for her life. She is a Christian and said that she is good with whatever God's will has for her. Bless her calcium deposited heart.
ETA: The dangling tooth de-dangled while I was out visiting with my aunt. K- was so thrilled that she gave me a call to let me know.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Aunt Donna and better news.
First, Aunt Donna's test results stunned her doctors and the nursing staff on the ward that she is on.
Her test results came back as PREcancerous. The doctor who did the colonoscopy came up to her himself to announce the results. The nurses were so stunned that they bought her balloons. Her primary care doctor was shocked.
The power of prayer is a good thing.
Her primary care doctor told her that she will be able to go through surgery. He anticipates that she'll be okay with it.
Now, onward to other news. Her scan came back showing a spot on her right breast and one in her lung. The primary care physician is keeping those on watch, as he thinks that the spot on her breast may be a calcium deposit (Grandma Gum had that) and that the spot on her lung may be asbestos? That sounds concerning to me, but her doctor, who makes no bones about letting her know if he is concerned, is okay to sit and watch.
Her roommate is dreadful, but my aunt is taking it in stride.
The nurses absolutely love her and she makes them laugh. It's a good thing to be a blessing.
So, we're praying. We're being thankful. We're being cautious. Thanks for praying. Keep up the good work!
Her test results came back as PREcancerous. The doctor who did the colonoscopy came up to her himself to announce the results. The nurses were so stunned that they bought her balloons. Her primary care doctor was shocked.
The power of prayer is a good thing.
Her primary care doctor told her that she will be able to go through surgery. He anticipates that she'll be okay with it.
Now, onward to other news. Her scan came back showing a spot on her right breast and one in her lung. The primary care physician is keeping those on watch, as he thinks that the spot on her breast may be a calcium deposit (Grandma Gum had that) and that the spot on her lung may be asbestos? That sounds concerning to me, but her doctor, who makes no bones about letting her know if he is concerned, is okay to sit and watch.
Her roommate is dreadful, but my aunt is taking it in stride.
The nurses absolutely love her and she makes them laugh. It's a good thing to be a blessing.
So, we're praying. We're being thankful. We're being cautious. Thanks for praying. Keep up the good work!
Monday, January 23, 2012
C
Though some of the inside pieces of this are subject to change, my aunt is currently in the hospital and as of this morning, with no family present, was given cancer as a diagnosis.
How my heart breaks for her.
She went into the hospital on Friday, knowing that blood counts were down and whatnot. Her doctor had ordered a colonoscopy and an endoscopy. The colonoscopy was performed this AM and gave details of a large tumor present, as well as polyps. She had no idea when the test was going to be today, but called at 6:30 AM to say that, "Her chariot had arrived."
Currently, she is handling the news okay. I think that she might be in disbelief. I know that she hasn't been heeding the signs that her body has given to her. Still, I don't know for how long. Grandma had been sick for some time and after she died last December, Aunt Donna went into a deep depression. She seemed to snap out of it personality wise, but she seemed to still be lagging.
Yuck. Cancer sucks.
How my heart breaks for her.
She went into the hospital on Friday, knowing that blood counts were down and whatnot. Her doctor had ordered a colonoscopy and an endoscopy. The colonoscopy was performed this AM and gave details of a large tumor present, as well as polyps. She had no idea when the test was going to be today, but called at 6:30 AM to say that, "Her chariot had arrived."
Currently, she is handling the news okay. I think that she might be in disbelief. I know that she hasn't been heeding the signs that her body has given to her. Still, I don't know for how long. Grandma had been sick for some time and after she died last December, Aunt Donna went into a deep depression. She seemed to snap out of it personality wise, but she seemed to still be lagging.
Yuck. Cancer sucks.
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