Friday, July 20, 2012

You know, we've gotten a lot of heat over the years.

Hubs and I have gotten some heat over the years since we decided to stay with the 1 1/2 child count.  (Bailey, bless her, was a half baked baby.)  There are folks who just don't go there because they know the details of what happened with Bailey.  There are folks who frankly, just don't consider that. 

K- came to us as an incredible blessing.  My friend, Holly (the reason for K-'s existence in our family) sent me a link to a blog today.  She said that she knew that we were a more than one child family, but thought the posting to be appropriate. 

How right she was.

Days before Aunt Donna's death, she told me that, "You could have had more kids, you know."  :tip of the head:  "I talked with someone about it and they said that you could have had more, you just chose not to have more."  :deep breath to contain anger at someone who didn't know me or the circumstances:  "Well, we chose to stick with what the doctors and specialists in charge of my care told us to do.  When asking the OB in charge of my care at that point what we would do if, God forbid, I would become pregnant again, she said, 'We'd do the best we could and pray.'"  Really, there was someone out there telling my aunt that I could have more kids?  I understand that my aunt wanted us to adopt more, but it didn't happen.  We kept our foster parenting/adoptive license open for 4 years.  At the 4 year point, we opted not to renew.  That was a choice that took many months and piles of tears to make.  It was a choice that we made for us-- for our family.  We considered ourselves so blessed.  We still do. 

So there you have it.  In regard to the number of children you have, you need to pray about it and do what is best for you. 

To that I say, Amen.

Smiles in my day:
-  Being involved in VBS.  Though we are at a new church and have decided to go forward for membership, I felt my summer lacking without the hustle and bustle of being deeply entrenched in VBS.  I helped to decorate today and have been put in charge of the missions project.  My sister will be bringing her kids a few days this week and staying since she lives a ways out, and I am excited for her to check out a new church that may be a good fit for her and her family.  We'll be working together as a team (as we normally do) and gathering/counting missions donations together.  :)
-  Rachael went to the doctor today and found out that her ankle required quite a bit of hardware.  She'll be unstapled and casted next week.  By my understanding, her healing seems to be on target, though her leg is a bit unsightly at this moment.  (By what she says.)  That goodness for good insurance and for folks talented enough to fix that stuff. 

Have a great weekend!


ChupieandJ'smama (Janeen) said...

I'm always amazed that people share opinions so freely on such private decisions (or in your case really non decisions when your life is threatened). K is a wonderful, beautiful child and such a blessing. What more could you ask for?

People need to find filters and keep their noses out of other peoples business. You can't believe the comments I get about having #3 at the ripe old age of 42.

Rach said...

I learned this lesson the hard way. I have a dear friend who had a child who was only a couple of weeks younger than Lil. When I became pregnant with Ellie, in a very friendly sort of way I would jest with him and tease and ask, "When are you guys going to have another?" to which he would smile a little and shrug.

Turns out they had been experiencing complications and miscarriages and I (and others) were causing much heartache and pain. I felt like such a dog when his wife told me. :o(

Never again will I comment on folks and their childbearing/having/adopting choices. It's none of my business.